JAMES C. FINDLEY 1834/35 to Aug. 1899

 James C. FINDLEY was the grandfather of Reba (RESSLER) GARNER. He has somewhat difficult to track due to the last name being spelled as FINDLEY and FINLEY. The constant spelling issues became a frustration, and I would put his file back in the file cabinet for "another day".

I wish that I had questioned Grandma more about her grandparents, but I failed to do so. Plus, James would have been dead several years when she was born. Whatever she may have known about him would have been told to her by other, older relatives.

I suspect his parents are Samuel and Sarah FINDLEY, but so far have nothing to confirm this for sure. I have found family trees on Ancestry that state Samuel and Sarah (GOOD) FINDLEY/FINLEY are his parents, but none of them have documentation. Um...it does make me wonder if I am on the right track though.

I have not found a Samuel FINDLEY on Find a Grave that is the right age or with the correct spouse in Pennsylvania. This despite trying various years and places within Pennsylvania. However, on Find a Grave, there is a Sarah (GOOD) FINDLEY buried in Glen Run Cemetery of Chester County, PA. She is listed as 77 years old. No spouse is connected to her memorial (#21720749). She might be a possibility to return to later.

So, what do I know about James?

Per the 1850 census, he was 14 and lived in the household of Samuel and Sarah FINLEY. He had siblings: Enos (16), Samuel (13), Mary (11), Lewis (9), and John (7). His father is listed as a farmer, so James would have grown up working hard helping with this. The census says they were in Sadsbury, Lancaster County, PA, which is in far southern Lancaster County.

He must have gotten married in 1859 or 1860, since Andrew Edwin FINDLEY was born in 1860. Per the 1860 census of Colerain Township, James FINDLEY is listed as a farmhand and age 25. Martha is 24. 

In 1863, James was drafted into the 9th Pennsylvania Volunteer Calvary. 

Per Wikipedia, the campaigns for this regiment included: Battle of Richmond, Battle of Perryville, Chickamauga, Sherman's March to the Sea, and various campaigns in the Carolinas. 

Source: Ancestry (James is the first line)

I found this photo on Wikipedia of a reunion for this regiment in 1893 at the same link as above. I have no idea what James FINDLEY looked like so cannot possibly identify him in the photo, if he is there.

The 1870 census lists James FINDLEY as age 40 with Martha his wife as 37. They have children: Edwin (Andrew) age 10, Mary age 8, Sarah age 6, Wilkes age 4, and Ann age 1. The family lives in Strasburg Township. James is a farmer with $1300 value in real estate, and $400 in household goods.

In 1880, James FINDLEY and family are living in Eden, Lancaster County, Penn. The household consists of: James (head), Martha (wife), Andrew (20), Mary (18), Sarah (16), James (14), Martha (12), Clarressa (10), Margaret (8), Susan (6), and Emma (3). 

Notice there is no "Wilkes" but there is a James the right age. I think Ann in 1870 and Martha in 1880 are the same child.

The 1890 census does not exist for this area that I am aware of. 

His life tragically ended on 02 August1899 in an accident. According to the obit, he was hauling wood in a wagon down a steep hill, fell out of the wagon, and the wagon ran over his head killing him instantly. It lists the children noting that there were still three at home. It also lists his siblings: Samuel FINDLEY of Parkesburg, Martin FINDLEY of Mechanicsburg, John FINDLEY of Christiana, and Enos FINDLEY of Quarryville.

Source: Intelligencer Journal Newspaper, Lancaster, PA (Page 1) 3 August 1899

Find a Grave has this photo of his tombstone in Greenwood Cemetery. His memorial is #104526541.  

PLEASE NOTE: 
ALL PHOTOS AND WRITTEN CONTENT ARE MY OWN UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.

GREAT DEPRESSION TALES

Grandma and Pappy GARNER spoke openly about how hard the Great Depression was and their own survival skills to make it through. I grew up on their stories and memories. 

Many of those same skills I learned and practice routinely. I choose to live frugally and in the current economic situation here in the US, I am sure glad this has been a way of life for many years.

Source: my personal collection

I was reminded of this recently while watching a grandma talk to her adult gr-daughter about ways to make money go further. These tips included food, household tips, gardening, and even car repairs.

Some background:

Nationally here in the US, the Great Depression was from 1929 to 1941. Unemployment, depending on place and year, ranged from 8% to 24%. Inflation rose, banks failed, children were put in orphanages because parents could no longer feed then, and people migrated around the country looking for work.

 At the same time, the Dust Bowl was going on in Texas, Oklahoma, Nebraska, Kansas, Colorado, Wyoming, and the Dakotas. These two factors caused many problems for families, communities, the economy and the US as a whole. No matter who you are, you benefit or suffer by what goes on in agriculture.

Source: Shutterstock

Here are some facts and stories about the Great Depression in Pennsylvania.

Source: Bing clip art

And due to the issues here in the US, the entire world economy was affected in various ways. 

Their own Great Depression Tales:

Food was a huge issue for Grandma and Pappy GARNER. Both were farm kids. And both were from large extended families that helped each other, especially during hard times. 

Clothing and shoes for growing children were a well-known issue for both of them. And making every penny count was just how they lived. Waste of anything was not allowed.

Reba RESSLER (grandma)completed tenth grade and went to work as a live-in maid for a Jewish doctor in Lancaster County. She was 16. At about this same time, she was introduced to Ralph GARNER, and they started courting. 

This occurred at the very beginning of the Great Depression in 1929 or 1930 - grandma could not remember exactly - she just knew she was 16. She remembered that they would meet once a week and go to the movies or out to eat - not both. Grandma remembered being paid $1.50 a week in addition to room and board. She worked there for five years.

A side note here is that grandma learned some interesting Yiddish words during this time, that until her death on occasion, peppered her regular "Pennsylvania Dutch". It added spice to conversations that otherwise occurred in English, German, and PA Dutch - depending on where we were and who was involved in the discussion.

Pappy had been working for a local farmer as a laborer at the same time. He moved around to different family members to live. Money was tight, and if he wanted to marry and have a family he needed a better job - something not easy to come by in that economic situation.

Source: Bing clip art

At some point in these years, Pappy was able to get a job driving a milk truck for Moore's Dairy. It was steady work and paid well for the time. At one point, brothers Ralph, Clyde and Lester GARNER all worked driving milk trucks for the same dairy.

So, Ralph and Reba decided to marry. I really do not know how long they were engaged. I got the impression that possibly Reba's father (Frank RESSLER) was not too thrilled with her decision to marry. However, I am not sure of that. I do know that they waited until Reba was 21 and would not need a parent's signature on the marriage license. Ralph Garner and Reba Ressler married on 30 March 1935 in Carlisle, PA. 

There was no money for fancy wedding or special clothes. Pappy wore his Sunday suit, and Grandma bought (or made) a dress that she would wear for church and special occasions. The money they had for the wedding was spent on railroad tickets to get to and from Carlisle.

According to the Lancaster Directory for 1935, Ralph and Reba GARNER were living on Lemon Street in what in now downtown area of Lancaster. They rented. Neither of them liked living in "the city". I have not been able to find documentation yet, but believe they lived at this address until purchasing the house on Chestnut Street in West Lancaster in 1937.

According to Pappy, the original mortgage was for $4,000 and by the time it was paid off, the total was $6000 because of the interest. Pappy continued to work for the dairy, and Grandma took in laundry and ironing. She also kept a large vegetable garden. The garden supplied their food and allowed Grandma to make some much needed money by selling the extra produce. They also kept chickens - which supplied needed meat and eggs. 

Mom (Pauline) was born in July 1937. Pappy, Grandma, and Pauline are listed as a household in the 1940 census.

Potatoes and more potatoes - 

Source: Bing clip art

Grandma cooked meals from scratch. During the Depression years, my impression from both interviews and overheard conversations that potatoes were a huge part of diet. Left-over mashed potatoes could be made into fried potato cakes for another meal. Soup and stew could be stretched by adding water and more potatoes. 

Grandma grew potatoes in the family garden, but I believe it was not enough to feed the amount of people who could turn up for meals. Even in my lifetime, there was a continual flow of various family members who could and did show up for any meal. Mom remembered Amish men bringing in large burlap bags of potatoes that were taken to the cellar. 

My memories are having mashed potatoes for supper. Then potato cakes with breakfast, and boiled potatoes with lunch. I have no memories of baked potatoes at grandmas, although we ate many of them when mom cooked at home.

During the depression years, it sounds like most meals were meatless or that only Pappy got meat. A chicken might be killed and fried for Sunday lunch.

Grandma kept a container in the fridge and all vegie and meat leftovers went into that. Whatever was in the container was the start of the next soup or stew. Nothing was wasted.

Just as a note here: My sister and I joked as children that peeling and cutting up potatoes would never be a threat of punishment to us as we did so much of it while at grandma's.

Clothing:

Some clothing was homemade while others were purchased. Mom (Pauline) told me she hated playing in a way that might show her underwear. This was because Grandma made slips and panties from old sugar and flour sacks - the writing still showed and how embarrassing to be known as that poor.

Mom's dresses and aprons could be hand-me-downs from older and bigger cousins. Or they might be cut down clothing that Grandma got ahold of used. Some of the nicer and new items were purchased by Uncle John and Aunt Emma REESE, who could not have children but had disposable income to use that way.

Source: my personal collection

Shoes were an expense that could not be avoided. Shoes were worn hard and passed around until there was nothing left. Mom said she usually got new shoes but that she had to wear them until they pinched her feet before she got another pair.

Rationing:

Mom still had a ration card from her childhood until the day she died. Ration cards could cover items like sugar, milk, meat, coffee, eggs and cheese.

Since both sets of parents (meaning the Frank RESSLER and Ben GARNER families) were still on the farm, Grandma said that Pappy saved the gas coupons to use so they could go out to either of the farms to visit and get items like meat and more produce on the weekend. What did people do who did not have gardens or family to turn to for help?

Source: my personal collection

Grandma (Reba GARNER) even mentioned the hobos who would show up at the backdoor and ask to do some work around the house in exchange for a meal. She said she never let them into the house, and Pappy had a list of things that could be done. 

Mom remembered men sitting on the back steps eating hot soup or stew out of a tin can.  If it was baking day, these men may also have gotten a slice of bread and a piece of pie.

According to both Pappy and Grandma, they never did figure out how their house was marked so hobos knew they could get a meal there. 

Source: Bing Clip Art

What they did have was family - 

No one has perfect families or is perfect themselves. But in hard times having a good relationship with family members and close friends can make the hard time pass easier. 

Grandma and Pappy spoke of these hard years with many smiles and good memories. Mom remembered family get-togethers and all kinds of toys and games that involved what was on hand and a good imagination.

Whether it was actual work or help in another way Grandma said no one could get through times like these without others to help with the load.

Personally, I think these lessons are very much a help for the current time. Being grateful, not wasting anything, spending carefully, and helping each other can go a long way to getting through any hard time.

As for the house:

Winter 1955-56. The oldest photo I have of the front of the house at 1747 Temple Ave., Lancaster, PA - Source: my personal collection

The deed was recorded in Nov. 1949 - so they worked hard and paid off the house in 12 years. The previous owners were named Frank and Violet MOWRER. On the deed, the house is listed as being on West Chesnut St - Lot 96, Manor Township, West Lancaster.

I haven't done the necessary research to find out exactly when the address changed. However according to the city directories, I have been able to find, the address of the house changed from West Chestnut St in West Lancaster to 1747 Temple Ave., Lancaster sometime between 1952 and 1957.

I personally only remember the address being 1747 Temple Ave, but I do have several documents that use the old address on West Chestnut Street. Maybe the address change was a way to solve confusion between West Chestnut Street in Lancaster and this short street in West Lancaster. Maybe someday I will do some research on this but for now I understand that the house and/or family did not move - the street was simply renamed.

Pappy died in 1986, and Grandma lived here until 1994 or 1995 when she sold it. She then resided at the Mennonite Home until her death in 1996.

 

All the content writing and photos of this post is my own unless I state otherwise.

INTERVIEW NOTES FROM GRANDMA GARNER

INTERVIEW NOTES FROM GRANDMA GARNER

After writing the last post, I dug out my interview notes from Grandma (Reba GARNER) that happened in Oct. 1986.  She rarely discussed her maternal grandparents, and on this day she was telling me about one of her maternal uncles. We grabbed lemonade to drink, and sat down so she could think and I could write.

So these are my actual notes from that discussion:

Children of Andrew Edwin and Mary C. (REESE) FINDLEY in no order --

Martin

Anna Bertha "Bert" who married Frank Y. RESSLER b. 1885 d. 1953

Elmer - a coal dealer

Edward, single, served in WW1, died when he fell down an elevator shaft

David, single, served in WW1, committed suicide

Clayton died of lung trouble

Esther, married name was REINHART and died of hard work

Joseph, farmer

Myrtle, "not right in head", died of old age maybe this year. Had an illegitimate child by one of the WIGGENS boys. Married twice after that.

She did not want me to take notes on the story she was telling, so I listened only. I did not write it down later and have since forgotten the story. So much for documenting memories carefully.

_____________________________________

I have worked on Andrew and Mary FINDLEY in bits and pieces, but not very seriously since I had more info on other lines. Plus I wanted to interview as many living people as possible while I had time. This line got pushed to the back of  a long list of others.

I was recently contacted by a gr-gr-grandchild of one of the listed children. The questions and comments prompted me to dig out my notebooks and look for these notes above. On the surface, the notes seem to lack a whole lot of information, but the "facts" allowed me to actually find some basic info for these people really fast in a two hour block of research.

Here is the basics of what I added in a quick search on FAG and Ancestry:

John Martin FINDLEY 1882 - 1956. Married Mary E. MUSSELMAN in 1905. Buried at Millersville Mennonite Cemetery, Lancaster Co., PA

Anna Bertha (FINDLEY) RESSLER 1885 - 1953 More info and a photo. Buried at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

Edward Harry FINDLEY 1888 - 1927. Per the death certificate, he did die from a fall down an elevator shaft. His job was listed as an engineer. Found him on two rosters as an Army engineer. Census in 1920 shows Edward in Philadelphia. Buried at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

Jacob Clayton FINDLEY 1889-1962. Married to Chella Blanche TRIMBLE. Buried in Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

Charles Elmer FINDLEY 1891 - 1968. He died of heart troubles per his death certificate. Married to Stella PAES. Buried at Conestoga Memorial Park, Lancaster, PA

Esther (FINDLEY) REINHART 1893 - 1969. Married to Harry REINHART. Buried at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA 

Thomas David FINDLEY 1895 - 1930. Buried with his parents at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

Martha Louisa FINDLEY 1897 - 1915. Died of heart and kidney issues per death cert. Buried at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

Andrew Joseph FINDLEY 1900 - 1967. Married to Mabel E. LOUMP. Buried at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

Myrtle B. FINDLEY 1904 - 1985. Buried at Willow Street Mennonite Church Cemetery, Willow Street, PA

The 1900 Census shows the FINDLEY family in Providence Township, Lancaster Co., PA:

Andrew - farmer

Mary C - wife

Martin - son

Bertha A - daughter

Harry E. - son

Jacob C. - son

Charles E. - son

Jenny (?) E. - daughter (I suspect this is Esther due to age)

Thomas D. - son

Martha L - daughter

The 1910 Census in Providence Township, Lancaster Co., PA:

Andrew - farmer

Mary C. - wife

Esther - daughter

David - son

Martha - daughter

Joseph - son

Myrtle - daughter

John Reese - brother-in-law

The 1920 Census in Providence Township, Lancaster Co., PA:

Andrew - still farming

Mary C - wife

Joseph - son and farm laborer

Myrtle - daughter

The 1930 Census in Providence Township, Lancaster Co., PA: 

Andrew - farmer

Mary C. - wife

Myrtle - daughter

Donald - grandson

Mary REINHART - granddaughter

At this point, I am thinking that Donald is the son of Myrtle and the WIGGINS boy. However, he is listed with FINDLEY as last name. Mary REINHART would have been the daughter of Esther REINHART.

I follow the rabbit trail back to FAG and looked up all the FINDLEY names buried in Lancaster County, PA since 1900. Yep, there is a Donald FINDLEY the right age. The memorial says he was the son of Myrtle FINDLEY, no mention of any WIGGINS boys - need to hunt up a death cert.

____________________________________________________

MY SUGGESTION:

Ask people questions and pay attention. Take good notes based on what was actually said. At a later date, use those notes to do real research. 

You can see from my original notes that what was there was very basic.  However, I was able to use that to find more info without really digging.

 Not all the people you interview will have sharp memories - take notes anyway. It is your job as the family historian to sift through all the stuff and come up with the real facts.  

Realize that some of your beliefs or assumptions will change as more facts come to light.  Unless you are writing a fiction story, all of us should want real facts. Most, if not all families, have skeletons in our family trees. In my opinion they make the story more interesting. 

Do not cringe away from finding out about those criminals, crime victims, illegitimate children, military horror stories, slaves, slave owners, prostitutes, shady businessmen, and imperfect people in your family history. All of them are part of your family history. 

Gather the facts of the "good, bad, and ugly" of your family. Each of them was a living person and deserves the chance to speak of their life. 

All the post content writing and photos is my own unless I state otherwise.

CLAIM YOUR FAMILY ROOTS

CLAIM YOUR FAMILY ROOTS

This week I had a few hours to visit with another family historian in my area. We have no known ancestors in common. My takeaway from the visit was simply to "claim your family roots".

Source: Bing clip art

 My roots are deep in Lancaster County, PA. I have at least two maternal lines that arrived in 1710/1711. In other words, years before Lancaster was even a "real" city which was generally felt to have been founded in 1729.

Growing up, I was that quiet child who observed everything and asked many questions. My elderly relatives humored me with answering questions, telling me family stories, and even bringing out old family photos with explanations of who was in the photos. What a treasure of info and memories.

Some relations took me along to clean family gravestones in various cemeteries in the county. Another opportunity to listen, watch, and learn. More notes into those notebooks that have become my go-to when I need to remember some small possible fact that I am looking for as I search for family information. 

Family reunions were another great occasion to listen, ask, and learn. More notes into notebooks. 

I grew up in the American West. However, my mom Pauline (GARNER) APPLEBACH/HAHN loved her heritage and was proud of her roots in Lancaster County. She spoke with the accent and vocabulary of Lancaster County until the day she died.

I also find myself using the vocabulary and sayings of Lancaster County. The Amish out here in Indiana hear me speaking while I am in their shops and have me pegged for a native from the Lancaster area. German and "Dutch" words pepper my daily speech too. 

 We went to Lancaster County at least once a year. Many years Pappy and Grandma GARNER (with assorted other relatives) visited us out West. 

Shoo-fly pie, apple dumplings, potato bread, sauerkraut, scrabble, Sturgis pretzels, and Lebanon bologna were normal foods for us. We ate these items with more "normal" western food. It did not seem odd to us at all. 

I love the skills of the Amish, and there is no way to pull me away from watching an Amish barn raising if I know of one, or randomly find one. 

I can and do make my own candles, bake bread, and cook from scratch as time allows. I can make my own clothes. When the kids were home, we played board games and read books I grew up on. My grandma introduced me to books illustrated and/or by Tasha TUDOR. I collect those books now. 

I want to continue to learn all I can about Lancaster County and how my family fit into the history of it. I have traveled and lived in Germany which gave me another opportunity to learn the history of my ancestors. Culture, language, and history can help so much when doing family history. Our ancestors were not just names, dates, and places. They lived, loved, and died in what we now consider "history" but to them was day to day life.

An elderly aunt recently asked me why I continue to work on my genealogy. My response was that it took all those people to make me. After visiting with the other family historian, it really dawned on me that I had "claimed my family roots" long, long ago. 

My advice to you readers is to learn all you can about the people in your ancestry - "Claim your family roots". If you take the time to get to know the history, culture, and basic words or language of your ancestors they will make so much more sense to you.

Source: Bing clip art

All writing and/or photos are mine unless otherwise stated.

JUST MARRIED - RALPH & REBA GARNER 1935

 JUST MARRIED - RALPH & REBA GARNER 1935

One of the things I found tucked away in my many notebooks of notes and interviews with family members was Grandma telling me about her wedding.

I obviously did not know all the questions to ask and so I am still left with some questions, but here is grandma's story:

Ralph GARNER was working on a farm in the Quarryville, PA area.  Reba RESSLER was living and working for a doctor in Quarryville. They met there in town (my notes are unclear whether at a restaurant, or the movie house) and dated once a week for at least a year. 

Working on the farm did not pay much, and they did not make any kind of wedding plans until Ralph got a better paying job at Moore's Dairy driving a milk truck. Grandma said she worked for that doctor for five years starting when she turned 16 or 17.

Ralph GARNER and Reba RESSLER went to the Lancaster County courthouse and picked up their marriage license on 26 March 1935. The license number is #17003.

Source: my collection

Ralph GARNER and Reba RESSLER wanted to be married by a preacher they both liked but had recently moved to Carlisle, PA.  

Two of grandma's siblings Anna and Clarence went along as witnesses.

 All four of them rode the train from Lancaster to Carlisle and were the marriage happened at the preacher's house.

My notes do not include how quickly they all came back from the wedding, but I believe from overheard comments at the 50th Anniversary that it was the same day because all four of them had to go back to work the next day. 

On the marriage license it looks like the preacher was C. C. SMITH.

On 03 April 1935 a small reception was done at the home of Harry & Mary (RESSLER) MILLER in Oxford by Reba's family.

Reba stated to me that the clothing in the photo was what they wore to be married in. 

 The below photo was on a dresser in their bedroom until grandma died and I received the papers and photo from grandma. Now it proudly is displayed in my living room.

Source: my collection

This photo is the Frank & Bertha (FINDLEY) RESSLER family and was also taken 03 April 1935. Anna is missing from photo (maybe she was taking the photos??)

Source: My collection

Just a side note:

For Ralph & Reba's 25th Anniversary they invited Pastor & Mrs. SMITH to the reception.  Here is a photo of the original wedding party.

Source: my collection

Here is at the 50th Anniversary celebrated 17 Feb. 1985.  The SMITH's are dead, but Ralph, Reba, Anna, and Clarence are still looking great.

Source: my collection

PLEASE NOTE: 
ALL PHOTOS AND WRITTEN CONTENT ARE MY OWN UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.

USING FIND A GRAVE (FAG) IN YOUR FAMILY RESEARCH

USING FIND A GRAVE (FAG) IN YOUR FAMILY RESEARCH

 I have been asked several times recently what I think of the website Find A Grave (FAG)for helping with family research. Honestly, I think it is a wonderful tool. 

Plus if you have a desire to volunteer on your own schedule it is a great way to give back by taking photos in cemeteries or adding your own research.

However, just like on-line family trees, be careful.  Some people are very careful with the content and photos - others seem to just put anything on the memorials.  I personally think some people "collect" memorials like baseball cards.  Use the information on any memorial as a clue for more possible information.

I strongly recommend that if you will be using this site a lot to set up a free account.  While you can look around all you like without an account, if you want to add photos, request corrections, or ask that relatives memorials be transferred to you an account is necessary.  

This is how the homepage looks today (below).  The photos change based on the season. Beware that there are a lot of genealogy related ads on this site, which can slow down how long it takes to load.

Basic searching: 

Searching for a memorial can be done several ways.  I usually start with a name, death year (options are exact, before, or after) and a place (such as county and state).  Below is a very basic search for my grandfather, Ralph Groff GARNER.

This is what comes up from that basic search:

If I click on the listed memorial, this is what I see: 

This memorial has burial info, family info, photos, and connections to other family member's memorials.

Sometimes you will have to do a broader search and you will get a list of memorials instead:

If I am looking for John GROFF in Lancaster County, PA who may have died before 1840 the list will look like this. Remember this may not be a complete list as the list is based strictly on memorials that have been made based on gravestones or known people.  Not everyone has a gravestone or even a memorial.

 According to the above screen there are 6 "John GROFF's" buried in Lancaster County, PA who died before 1840.  Now I (or you) can look at the list and make some choices based on years or cemeteries. 

I (or you) look over the list and find the one "John GROFF" we are looking for.  Great! Check the info with what you have or know. Use the links to various relatives as clues for more research.  I tend to screen shot the images into a Word document and put with my research.  

What if I can't find my "John GROFF" in Lancaster County, PA?  I usually will drop the county out the search first and just do the state.  People tended to be buried close to home or at their church's graveyard which may actually be in another county. In the case of "John GROFF" when I searched for all of them in PA who died before 1840 I still only got the same 6 as the above screen.  

So I will broaden the search again to include all of the US:

This time I got 11 memorials. Besides PA, burials were in NJ, Maryland, and NY. So you can see that changing the search criteria may bring other results.  Keep trying different spellings, years, and locations.

Some tips:

• Try different spellings of the name.
• Remember that not everyone has a middle initial, or uses their first name (maybe he/she used a middle or nickname instead).  Be flexible when searching.
• Be generous with the years.  If you are looking for someone who you think died in 1842 put in 1845 and before. 
• Be flexible with locations.  There are options to search for actual cemeteries.  Or you can search by county and state, or just by state.  Thanks to volunteers around the world, there are also some non-US cemeteries on here now.  Explore and see what you can find.
• It is possible to request a correction to a family memorial.  Be polite, supply the correction, and  always explain the source for the info. 
• Remember that with the exception of the FAG staff, everybody else is a volunteer or a family member.  They have lives and may not get to your requested edit as quick as you would like.  Be patient.
• Also remember that the person who has your relative's memorial does not have to change the information on the memorial.  If you feel the info is important, it is possible to contact the staff at FAG and have them look into it.  Always be polite and patient.
• The more you explore FAG and learn, the more information you will find.

Happy Searching.

PLEASE NOTE: 
ALL PHOTOS AND WRITTEN CONTENT ARE MY OWN UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.

AUNT MARY GARNER – the scandalous relative we do not discuss

 AUNT MARY GARNER – the "scandalous" relative we do not discuss 

Every family has at least one. The relative we do not discuss…

 I recently had a chance to do some research on my Gr-Aunt Mary GARNER.  I did not find her to be particularly a scandalous person, but for her time I can just imagine the gossip.

 Mary’s parents were Ben & Cora (GROFF) GARNER, who married in April 1906.  (See my blog for that story: https://lancastercountyfamilyties.blogspot.com/2020/05/garner-ralph-hoopla-around-his-birth.html ). The children of this union were:

**Ralph 1906-1986

**Mary 1908-1966

**Ella 1910-1994

**Clyde 1913-1956

**Lester 1915-2012

I do not find many photos or papers for gr-aunt Mary in either my mom’s or grandma’s photos or papers.  However, my mom had a lot of memories of visits with her, so I did not get the feeling Mary was some sort of social outcast. At least not an outcast at my grandparent’s home (which should surprise no one considering the family gossip about my grandfather). Two siblings that were close in age, and both the butt end of gossip.

I only have one photo of young Mary.  She is among numerous other GARNER relatives at a reunion in June 1923.  She would have been in her mid-teens. She had a profoundly serious look about her.

Source: my personal collection

    Growing up I knew Gr-Aunt Mary was married to Ben KREIDER and that they had no children.  But anything else was hush hush.  She was dead before any of my own memories, but I can think of many questions I would have liked to ask her if I had had the opportunity.

According to a clipping from the Lancaster New Era, Ben KREIDER and Mary GARNER married on March 24, 1928 at the parsonage of the First Methodist Church by Rev. A. M. WITWER.

Source: Ancestry & Lancaster New Era newspaper

According to some military documents that I found on Ancestry; Ben was in the Army from at least 1941-1943. Was their union already in trouble prior to him going off to war, and this was the final straw?

Going back to the Lancaster New Era newspaper, Ben KREIDER filed for divorce in Oct. 1942 on grounds of desertion.  They separated in 1940 so I would have to say there were already obvious problems before Ben went off to war.

Source: Ancestry & Lancaster New Era newspaper

    Whatever happened divorce-wise, Mary took back her maiden name.  My impression from comments made was that Mary was truly angry and bitter toward Ben until she died.

The Ben GARNER family was together on the farm in Quarryville during the summer of 1943 and took time to pose for a photo.

Source: my personal collection

This photo was taken in the mid to late 1940’s at my grandparents’ home in Lancaster, PA. Obviously Mary was welcome (despite her scandalous behavior) and was part of the family group.

Source: my personal collection

Here she is with her parents, probably on the family farm in Quarryville, PA circa 1950.

Source: My personal collection

Ben & Cora GARNER celebrated their golden wedding anniversary in April 1956. The family had a professional picture taken.  Clyde was sick with cancer at this point and would not live out the year.

Source: My personal collection

Mary died in 1966, also of cancer.  She is listed in her obit as “Miss” Mary GARNER.  There is no mention that she ever married. She worked at Hamilton Watch Factory for many years.

Source: My personal collection

Obviously, Gr-Aunt Mary worked and supported herself.  She had gotten some education and was a member of a church.  She was welcomed by family for at least some family functions.  Why did she and Ben divorce really?  She deserted him why? I do not remember her name ever mentioned with another man when she was discussed.  Whatever happened between Ben Kreider and Mary was known at the time, but not discussed to those of us who had no reason to know.

Let’s face it, every family has those relatives we do not discuss.  Sometimes why is kept quiet, other times it is common news in the papers for all to see.  Let me encourage you to just keep asking questions and keep searching. 

Before social media, people tended to regard personal privacy as a normal thing.  The why of happenings is not going to be easily found, but that does not mean the answer is not out there.

As for Mary, I am going to keep looking on Family Search and Ancestry to see what other information is available.  I will also try to order the divorce papers from the Lancaster County Archives too – who knows what information will turn up in that……

PLEASE NOTE: 
ALL PHOTOS AND WRITTEN CONTENT ARE MY OWN UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.

RESSLER, DANIEL 1801/02 - 1901

RESSLER, DANIEL 1801/02 - 1901

Daniel RESSLER was the son of Jacob and Susanna (BOEHM/BEAM) RESSLER.  At the bottom of this post are several links to other posts on this blog with more info on them and their family.

I wanted to share a photo that I found posted on Ancestry this week titled "Daniel B. RESSLER before 1901".  I have never seen a photo of Daniel.  I wanted to believe it was really a photo of him, but I am all about "proving" it. 

Source: JD Ressler Ancestry family tree - titled Daniel B. Ressler before 1901

After comparing the photo to his son John both as a young man and as an elderly man, I do think that this is a photo of Daniel RESSLER.  Wow, what a find - thanks so much to the person who posted it.

To see his memorial on Find a Grave, go here.

Here is a photo of Daniel's son John both as a young man, and then as an elderly man with his living children in 1915.

Source: my personal collection (previously in the possession of Reba (RESSLER) GARNER)

Source: Personal Collection (previously in possession of Reba (Ressler) Garner)

Other posts with info about Daniel RESSLER:

https://lancastercountyfamilyties.blogspot.com/2012/11/resslerrossler.html

https://lancastercountyfamilyties.blogspot.com/2017/12/dar-application-accepted-ressler.html

https://lancastercountyfamilyties.blogspot.com/2019/01/revisiting-jacob-susanna-boehm-ressler.html

PLEASE NOTE: 
ALL PHOTOS AND WRITTEN CONTENT ARE MY OWN UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.

GARNER, RALPH - Hoopla Around His Birth 1906

GARNER, Ralph - Hoopla Around His Birth 1906

It was certainly no secret in our family that "Pappy" (Ralph GARNER) had been conceived out of marriage by his folks.

So the story goes like this:

When Cora GROFF found out she was pregnant in the early spring of 1906, she told the father of said pregnancy Ben GARNER. His response was to take off for Ohio to hide with Mennonite or Amish cousins there. Cora complained to her parents, who complained to Ben's parents.  Ben's father (and possibly brothers) went to the cousin's home in Ohio and drug Ben back despite his protests and made him marry Cora.  Remember they were both minors and Ben admitted that the baby was his.

Notice on the below marriage license that both fathers had to give permission for the wedding to take place.

Source: my personal collection

While I never personally witnessed any unkindness toward my grandfather due to the hoopla of his conception and birth, from comments made in my hearing, it must have been quite the scandal at the time. Apparently it took my gr-grandfather several years to get over his snit at being forced to marry Cora, although as years went on that changed.

Ralph's early education suffered due to being shuffled around to different relatives and while in the 1910 census he is living with his parents, by the 1920 census he is living with his maternal grandparents.

My mom remembered her mom (with her 10th grade education) working with Pappy from the daily newspaper and family Bible to teach him to read.  I remember Pappy reading the Lancaster paper daily when I was around.

As an adult, Pappy told me that he only completed the second grade.

PLEASE NOTE: 
ALL PHOTOS AND WRITTEN CONTENT ARE MY OWN UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED.